Obstacles to stepping stones
I had intended a completely different opening for this week’s instalment but when I chose the image of a honeycomb for this post, my mind quickly made an association between the hexagonal shape and the lively 1990s British TV game show, Blockbusters. Some of you will remember the cult tea-time TV show hosted by I’ll-have-a-P-please-Bob Bob Holness. The game board was a honeycomb filled with letters and contestants answered trivia questions to create a path across or down the hexagons.
The honeycomb made by bees achieves its strength from the shape of each hexagon which supports the whole structure. For Bob’s contestants, each block answered correctly leads them closer to success and the ultimate ‘Gold Rush.’
I wanted to talk about the mental blocks that get in the way of success, particularly the those that stop us from exercising. Beyond the feeble excuses like, ‘I don’t have the time,’ there’s usually something deeper behind our resistance. I once had enough mental blocks to build a house!
I’m too fat
I’ll look stupid
But I’ll sweat my hair out
I’m too fat
I can’t do it
I’ve never been sporty
Exercise isn’t for me
I’m too fat
The pandemic gave me two things: extra time in my day due to working from home and fear for my health. The more I doom-scrolled about the immune system, symptoms, the more I knew that it was time to act.
Right after I’d made the decision to change, my mental blocks seemed to grow in stature. The largest blocks seemed to be scored with the words, ‘This isn’t you’ and ‘you’re too big to exercise’. My biggest obstacle was the one that’d convinced me that I couldn’t exercise because of my size.
The school bullies gifted me this block in PE class when I tripped over the high jump rope and went crashing onto the safety mat with a deafening thud, my eyes stinging and my face burning.
These painful memories occupied my mind when I started my first week of online workouts and my movements felt unfamiliar and stiff. Yet soon I was too busy concentrating on the moves and trying to breathe to worry about anything else!
Yes, I was out of breath and sweaty but I’d proved the bullies and myself wrong.
Looking back, I wasn’t convinced I’d stick to my workout plan. I’d started plenty of exercise programmes before, only to give up after a week.
But this time, instead of adding another mental block of failure, I turned up to each workout. Three times a week I did 45 minutes of cardio and each session chipped away at the mental block.
Whenever I missed a session, I made sure I turned up for the next one. No beating myself up, or using it as an excuse to quit. Not adding a judgement to your actions and moving forward instead has been key. Afterall, two missed workouts is nothing in a month of workouts!
When I look back over the past year of my life, I can see that each time I shifted a mental block out of my way, I created a new path. Each time I chose not to let my mind obstruct my goal, I strengthened my exercise habit and my resilience. Perhaps then these blocks are not obstacles but stepping stones to a new path.
Without them would I have had the confidence in my physical abilities to attempt that advanced barre class or set off on that 10-mile walk? Would I have the warm sense of pride in my dedication to exercising, whatever the weather or mood I was in? I don’t think I would.
As I shift and dismantle my house, I’m relocating the blocks to build a beautiful new path of resilience out of experience.
What to do when you hit a mental block:
1. Ask yourself if this is something that you truly believe to be true. Or does this judgement or assumption belong to somebody else (your parents, school bullies, societal conditioning)?
2. Can you do move the mental block aside for the time being, while you attempt whatever you were doing before it made you pause? You can choose to move it out of view and come back to it later.
3. Take action. Do something, anything instead of ruminating on your mental block. Take the dog for a walk, make a cup of tea, whatever it takes to break the chain of negative thoughts.
Image by David Hablutzel from Pixabay